The Swan Song Of Ben's Blogging

Thats it, exams have ended, and I want to end blogging too... I'm not the kind of person who gets back home and write little snippets of what I did with people you don't know and how I felt and how angsty I am and things like that. No. If i wanted that I would keep a diary, and NONE of you will be privy to it. I mean, would you really care about the inside jokes that I make with my clique of friends that you are not part of? Maybe you do. In that case, lurk facebook.

I belong more to the not so new breed of bloggers, people who prefer to just put a nice picture on the blog and caption it, or a image of some words that people will read because its in an jpeg file and its a different font. Or the blogsite for low attention span ppl: twitter.

But I don't like putting up pictures I didn't take or drawings I didn't draw or poetry I didn't write or songs I didn't sing (or at least didn't sing in tune). I don't wanna rip others off. Sure, stuff like that is nice, great to read and gawk at, meaningful even, but for me, I don't feel that I should put up other people's hard work so that my blog has something interesting to read. Not trying to diss the rest who do, its just that I can't do it. But YOU can, because you have the gift of finding the right images or words, or even the habit to spread cool stuff you found. You make the most interesting blogs. But i'm not you.

So thats two kinds of blogs I read that I won't write.

Instead, I kinda thought of an ambitious project that'll probably fail but its worth a shot. Its a compromise of a "standard" blog where you tell the world what you did and feel, with the other kind of blog i can't name, and an art page.

Anyway, I need an outlet for my crazy imagination that i lock myself into, that make me seem to be in my own world, that defines the kook that is Ben Leong.

Doug will be involved. He also has a friend name Katt. I can't decide if Katt is a boy or girl, maybe its grandfather was this famous one.

I really don't know what the eff I'm doing. But I want to do it well.

So its goodbye for beninhisden, which will now become a cesspit of blogmemes or mundane miscellany and a archival webpage. It also has a useful links section to better blogs.

If the procrastination will stop anytime soon,

Thezenofben.worpress.com will be activated.

Ramblin' on.

Cheers.

Hey poly peeps

Philosophical Question of the Day!

For actually checking if I update this blog, you get a reward! A PICTURE!!!! WITH A PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION TOOOOO!!!!! Hell yeah!

You may now return to your daily lives.

I'll make it a point to try to update this rusting site more regularly... But I just don't know how to express stuff through the form of a written blog anymore. It ain't me.

Instead I'll post random stuff here.

I just wish all my exams and projects will be smooth and pass quickly. I'm not aiming for good grades anymore. Forget it. I'm aiming for "can understand the questions" at this point of time. I have always scraped through poly exams, by a few marks or two, and i guess this one will be no different. Except theres a chance of not even being close to "scrapping" pass it liao...

I just want to apologize to my MP partner. My gpa is gonna pull our chances of getting the choice we want.

Ah. Screw it. Gonna read other ppl's blog, and try abit of bioinfo, and go to sleep.

So many ideas, but none of them regarding studies. Also, Zeninhisben!!!!!.... is still postponed.

The past few days, I think i bumped my head on something, and suddenly I got a EPIC RUSH OF CREATIVITY into my tiny cerebal cortex. I can't stop daydreaming of stuff, making up weird ideas, and worse, I am sleeping less. Even worse, NONE of this creativity is being channeled into my studies.

THE WORST: I got no time to put this creativity into use, as I gotta study, and ironically need to block out the ideas. The only time these torrent of craziness is jotted down is during boring lectures, where I quickly sketch and write these down, at the expense of attention to the overworked lecturers.

Ugh.

Hopefully I can keep this slightly unnecessary "creativity" on hold until I complete my exams...

You know why???

BECAUSE IF THEZENOFBEN DON'T OPEN WITH +/- 5 DAYS AFTER THE LAST PAPER, YOU CAN CONSIDER IT PERMANENTLY POSTPONED.

I can't procrastinate anymore. I set an actual dateline liao. I'm meant for more than what I'm going through now.

This kinda shows how I'm feeling right now

Exams, be merciful on me.

Stick with me baby.

PS: Isnt the beninhisden dog cute? His name is Dawg, he just met you, and he loves you!

PS PS: He has a tabbycat friend name Katt.

PS PS PS: This Katt has no relation to Katherine Ong at all, although they are of the same feline phenotype, and I knew Katt since before I joined poly. I think. Or even before I knew Kat.

PS PS PS PS: Pang Sai.

theZenofBen Opening soon! (again)

The front page design for TZOB is 75% done, which means it should be opening!..soon....

However, the content is like almost 0% done...

Anyway, i'll stop procrastinating. Tomorrow.

Anticlimatic New Year!!!

I was taking a bath, then suddenly I heard loud screaming from my neighbours, shouting "HAPPY NEW YEAR!". While i was bathing. While everyone is partying and getting all high and rowdy, I spent my first new year minute in the shower. Talk about exciting.

Anyway I was practicing songs for tomorrow's lg meet up, when a tiny baby lizard came onto my wall! Awesome cute! It was on my encouragement cards, and i quickly took pictures, scaring the poor creature. It ran away from my desk as this evil looking guy from above kept approaching him with a shiny looking machine, jumping onto "The Roald Dahl Omnibus", and later to the Bible. Actually... this post is useless without pics! I'll post some pictures of the cute little fella soon.

Yes, its new year and i begin by showering, realising how tone-deaf i am singing Stereophonics' Rewind (its a song for the meet up, but don't tell them!), and taking pictures of lizards. I'm a cool kind of guy.

Oh, Happy New Year

Too much to talk about

So much stuff, so little time. Really too tired to blog now. I'll just summarize what I have to say in point form.

-Being paid to be Santa Claus in front of the public is much more worse and less fulfilling then doing it from the bottom of your heart pro-bono in a Christmas outreach event

-Church camp, was, not gonna suger-coat it... Weird. It covered the whole spectrum of stuff. Its the best camp I ever been to, and also the worst. I had the best of times there, and also the lowest of times. Made some great friends and ticked off some old ones. Worked my best and slacked the most. Learned alot and learned nothing. Had a great location and also a not very conducive one. Was one of the best organized camps, but also organized in a strange way. Found out alot of things about myself, but am even more confused. Discouraged and encouraged me. Was spiritually attacked yet spiritually enlightened.

Anyway, at least the good outweigh the bad. In fact, its the bad parts of the camp that taught me alot of things.

Overall, this is definitely a very different camp for me. No impulsive jump jump or emo emo times. No reached-the-top-and-slide-back-down feelings. Rather than my other camps, which I felt were mountain peaks of my life, I felt this camp was a pit stop in the on-going climb up the (almost) never ending mountain of life.

I went for camp for two main purposes: To serve my best to God as a sub-comm member, and to reconnect with God. I'm glad I kind of fulfilled both objectives. Now its just up to me on my daily journey to take up my cross and follow Jesus.

-Carolling at taka was awesome.

-I STILL HAVN'T PLAYED LEFT 4 DEAD 2!!!!!!!!

-Thezenofben will not open until the front design has been finalized. That could take awhile.

-Cheer up, girl.

-Made some resolutions, but i shall break my ongoing resolution to not wait for New Year to make resolutions by procrastinating.

-lolololololololololololololololololololol

-Wow I became more and more lazy in typing posts. Just compare this with my posts of last year. Haha.

-Cya soon ppl

EPIC WEBCOMIC FANART HOLY SHIT

I just did the most epic fan-art that I have ever done! Ok, my only fan-art I ever done... But still EFFING EPIC HELL YEAH!

I did it hoping to win a t-shirt and stuff. And to kickstart my artistic career.

The webcomic is bearvszombies It has zombies and bears. Bears that talk. And are awesome. Talking animals too. And lots of undead celebrities.

Anyway heres THE EFFING SWEET PIECE OF ART WORK OH MY GOODNESS COWER IN FEAR YOU MORTALS

(sorry, having the case of finished-artwork-ego)



ITS TOO AWESOME OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT YOU

Really, sorry.

Anyway, thanks to my bro's girlfriend, who taught me gimp (even though she also use for first time), and Christie Tseng from deviantart who allowed me to use the background.

Awesome.

Busybusybusy

Looks like I won't be able to open thezenofben or update anytime soon. Theres term tests and projects to be done. After that theres church camp, and after that its carolling!!! Ugh soooo busy.... Anyway nothings gonna happen with the blogs anytime until, like probably after camp or something. 对不去！

P.S. I know 对不起 not 对不去 but my cheenis is so bad it'll sound like that

NO REALLY

LIVING PROOF HERE!


PHOTOS!!!!!!





SONGS!!!!!





WHAT THE HELL IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111one




AAAAAAH CANNOT WAIT LOLOLOLOLOL sorry himbo moment

ZENINHISBEN OFFICIAL COUNTDOWN

I got some material for Zeninhisben, and it will be up real soon! Got quizzes and tests to clear first.

Promise.

Thanks for your faithfulness.

under construction

To prove that i'm actually doing something, hears a sneak preview.

Its gonna fail like this blog anyway but never mind.

When it officially opens you guys will know. Thanks!

lolololol

Thezenofben will be created once Ben is bored. That could be anytime within the next 10 years. Anyway this blog won't be updated till then. Sorry.

Ty for visiting.

Dictionary for frustrated people

Medical Electronics [med-i-kuh i-lek-tron-iks, ee-lek-tron-iks]

-noun

1. A compulsory core subject in Biomedical Informatics & Engineering that Ben Leong is going to fail so bad
2. A inane process of doing something over and over and over and over again to see some elusive signal in a oscilloscope
3. Something that one puts in all his blood, sweat and tears in, but yielding nothing in return.



Pardon my language, but I really need to let it out.

FUCK IT.

Sorry.

I need something to at least work so badly. Let's not talk about any other subjects. Like Netfund. Why does it seem like I'm the only one in class who find it repulsive?


HALP

Every new beginning come from some other beginning's end.

First off, I would like to announce that Beninhisden.blogspot.com will be made obsolete soon. I just not a blog kind of person, I realised.

And blogspot is unfriendly in uploading images.
Blogspot is quite fail actually.

I'm kind of thinking of starting anew... u know? something more different. more weird. more adventurous. more epic.

Not a blog though.

Maybe like a personal website or something.

....
...
....

I like comics.
I like songwriting.
I like photography.
I hate blogging. Or reading other ppl's blogs, for the matter. Not yours, though. Your blog is awesome. If you have one. I'm talking about other people's ones. Yep.


All my life, I had lots of ideas running around my head. They can be anything involving me doing something big. And successful. Things like manning a successful enterprise. Or being a successful rock star. Or a successful rugby player.

Then I have more simple but still kinda-unrealistic ideas. Like successfully writing a proper song. Or have my own successful webcomic. Or successfuly updating a blog.

But the thing is, no matter what dreams or what funny ideas i have, I never even accomplish it.

Because I don't even attempt it.

Damn you facebook quizzes, computer games, bad websites... damn you things that waste my time!

I wasted a good amount of my life on things that never mattered. Maybe it mattered for that minute. I did not use it to start building my dreams into reality.

Simple "dreams" like getting my GPA out of the 2.3 region (there. I made it public) by actually sitting down and studying has been destroyed because of my love of wasting time. I am more than capable of doing it. But the point is, i'm not even trying.

rrrgh.

Anyway, my current short term goal is to score good marks for my semester exams. Thats my last chance of redemption. Quizzes are gone. Virtually all of them.

Oh, and also to reach school on time for once.

Unfortunately, the only way to do this is to declare war on everything that stops me from doing anything productive. (except playing guitar. That is considered productive usage of time. Seriously)

First thing to do is to stop typing now at 1.15 am and actually sleep early. That way I won't wake up late tomorrow.

Next, I should try and write another song.

Then spent some time with God, and sleep.

Wake up early.

Revise maths for upcoming quiz.

Start soldering. Yes, i did not even solder my ecg project. I'm probally the last one in class.

Shit!







Anyway, back to my first point, i'll probably stop updating beninhisden. Maybe only for memes, because memes are awesome.

Blogging is a total waste of time.

But ironically i hope to start another blog once exams are over.
Not really a blog... more of a website that allows me to actually have an attempt for accomplishing some dreams i have. Might die like this website, but at least I can say i tried.

When Thezenofben is created, you guys will know.

Anyway, goodbye blogosphere. For now, at least.

I got to stop wasting my life away.

This is war. And I can only win it with God by my side.

Ok. Good night. Gotta try waking up early once in a while.

This is not a good bye. This is a "see you later, alligator"

再见。

Is there something wrong with blogspot!?!?!?

I can't seem to write a post properlly!!! I writing this on the "preview" screen, and theres like a big white space in between this little box and the title.... everything is basically screwed up. I can't upload photos or do nothing.

Someone help!

upcoming changes in every dang thing

im in your netfund lab, not doing your lab work....

Firstly i would like to say i really dislike netfund, to the point that i find it the most boring subject i have taken in poly. Its not because its hard or what, its reeeeeeeeeally dry. If I wanted to learn how to set up a LAN shop, I would have joined IT. Thats what i keep telling ppl.

Anyway I want to make changes. Firstly in this blog.

I want to start updating regularly again. Sorry for the 1 month lapse of updates. I would like to start by redesigning the whole thing. Either change the skin or make my own (don't know how, can ask ppl). I would give the cute dog a break from screaming "BEN IN HIS DEN!" everytimesomeone comes here (which is like once every year). He'll be relegated into a smaller role, with hopefully some new "artwork".

Next, I want to make changes in my studies. I have to start nao. No more procastination/.

I also want to honour my commitment to not sleep past 2 o' clock, and come to school on time for a change.

That would be all. Too much change is bad. Even Obama takes his Change pledge slow, so i better do that too.

I'm going through changes. - Ozzy Osbourne

Killing Fields re-uploaded. Fuck you terrorists.

This was written after the Mumbai attacks. I'm re-posting this in response to the recent Jakarta bombing.

This kind of shit really affects me. I don't see why so many innocent people have to die so unnecessarily like this. I really really really still can't grasp what the ones who commit such deeds gain. This was an attempt to get into their minds and try to fathom what are going on in their minds. This is as close I can get. But I still don't understand.

Killing Fields Of Hate

Killing fields of hate
Killing fields of blood so red
How I love to fight in your
Killing fields of hate

See these guns and bombs of mine
With these I put my life on the line
And on the blood of innocents I shall dine

See all this unbridled rage
Demons released from its cage
I will turn the page

What for? I don’t know
For peace? Love? Justice? God?
It seems that death is the only way
Maybe I’m brainwashed.
Maybe I’m possessed
Or maybe I just love to be in the

Killing fields of hate
Killing fields of blood so red
How I love to die
In your killing fields of hate

See the lies I have swallowed
And the ammunition I have borrowed
Hatred and prejudice soon followed

See the people in the meadow
If only they just lined up and follow
Where they deserved to be they shall go

What for? Personal gain?
Someone arrest me or I’ll kill them
Corrupted by the inconvenient truth of man
Maybe I’m crazy
Maybe I’m suicidal
Or maybe I just love to be in the

Killing fields of hate
Killing fields of blood so red
How everyone is going to suffer
In my personal fields of hate

Wow an update

Discuss